Wrong Jet to Judo
by TheNightshade43
Summary: Typhon Nightshade has a mission. Find a source of a certain signal. But then the Lamboghini Twins decide to try Jet Judo on him...too bad they chose the wrong jet to try it on.


Snapshot: Wrong jet to judo

Typhon grew bored with his patrol on Earth. He was supposed to find something out of the ordinary. Too bad his superiors didn't specify. He was alone. Though a few of his comrades offered a servo in helping him the Communication Officer refused politely. He preferred being alone anyway. No one around to bother him or pester him with questions. No one to look after if a battle presented itself. He could disappear in a blink of an optic. Even the most advanced radar systems had trouble tracking him properly. And his psychic Sense was more than a match for any scout or spy that decided to try and track him.

His alt mode was a stealth fighter jet. The Black Widow F23 to be exact. He didn't reflect any light so drawing attention wasn't an issue. In fact he was so quiet not many knew he was approaching until he was right behind them; contrasting many Seekers and other jet-based units.

The scenery was pretty basic; mountains as bare as they were brown. Ragged bone-like rocks seemed to jut from the ground in erratic spikes. The sharp smooth ocean pierced the landscape around it. The sky was sparsely clouded; no indication of a storm to be seen.

It was so peaceful and uninhabited that he didn't even notice two warriors sneak up on him until they leapt up into the sky in blurs of red and yellow; landing on him with synchronised thuds.

"I'm gonna win this time Sunstreaker!" The red Autobot bragged as he gripped onto the dark jet.

"In your dreams Sideswipe." The yellow one scoffed in reply, clambering over to Typhon's turbines.

The Decepticon growled. The 'Lambo twins', as they were often known as, were the plight of any jet that graced the skies. Every Seeker and air-based Decepticon often growled or shuddered when the accursed twins were even mentioned. As far as he knew they would do tricks on their prey while groping them, and or force them onto the ground where they could fully take advantage with their combined combative skills.

Typhon, for his part didn't panic. He watched them with his sensors, his engines revving when Sunstreaker edged a little too close to his thrusters.

"I would advise discontinuing your actions." He warned in the most passive tone he could muster. "Otherwise you may force me to take _drastic _measures..."

They only laughed at him after a moment of shock.

"Slaggit his voice is creepy." The red one admitted before recovering, smirking down at the jet he was sitting on. He was positioned in between Typhon's wings much like a rider on his steed. "Where'd you learn it from your daddy Soundwave?"

The yellow one laughed.

"Nice one bro'! Now...what to do..." His thoughts fired through Typhon's processor, making him mentally cringe. A servo reached for underneath his thrusters. Typhon swerved in the sky.

"Remove your servo or I will _force_ you." The Decepticon warned in a dark tone, the air seeming to grow dark around them for a moment.

Both Autobots shuddered.

"Not until you tell us what exactly you're doin' around here." Sunstreaker persisted, hanging off the jet's tail wing with one servo before lunging forward and clinging to his underside. Sideswipe scowled.

"Hey don't leave me high and dry!" He did a handstand before leaning back on his tail fins. Typhon lost balance for a moment. Keeping them both in the air was hard, especially when they kept shifting his balance.

"Last. Warning." Typhon announced quietly. By now his curiosity of them was wearing a little thin. He climbed up to twenty thousand feet, so slowly and subtly that the Autobots didn't even notice.

Both brothers reached for more sensitive areas on Typhon's alt form, hoping to intimidate him into landing.

"You may be a _psycho_ but you're still a jet! You all have the same weakness." Sideswipe bragged, petting the jet's nose with his pede.

"Amen to that. Surrender now...or..." Sunstreaker let the sentence hang, reaching in past the Decepticon's armour and loosening some wires for his version of interrogation.

Typhon didn't panic. He already had a plan.

"Oh so unwise..." He chided in a soft yet sinister tone. A moment later he cut his engines and dove nose down towards the ground in a free-fall.

None of them expected this to happen. For a moment they were simply too stunned to think. They clung to the Decepticon; unable to jump off him due to their impressive height off the ground. Adding dramatic effect he twirled over and over, and over again.

"WHAT THE SLAG ARE YOU DOING!?" Sunstreaker demanded as he clung for dear life.

"Why'd we choose the crazy one?" Sideswipe asked into Typhon's back. "We're gonna die..."

Typhon relished the chaos that ebbed from them.

_/I warned you that I would take drastic measures.../_ Typhon spoke to them through their minds; his voice was unable to function at such force. The Autobots didn't far too well against the g-force from the air; they weren't built for that type of pressure. When he felt their grip loosen he stopped, now only a few hundred feet off the ground.

"There; all better now?" He soothed to them as they groaned, watching the world spin from their disrupted balance centres.

"You're a sick fragger..." Sideswipe cursed, trying to prevent himself from purging onto the Decepticon.

Sunstreaker growled, tugging hard at the wires he had a hold of before.

"Don't do _that_ again!" He yelled, ripping a few of them out.

With a hiss Typhon felt his pain sensors spike dramatically. He growled.

"Enough games." He lurched down towards the ocean while the Autobots did what they could to force him to land. After the initial spike of pain there was nothing but pure chaos all around his frame. Sunstreaker made a brave ploy to destabilise him while Sideswipe did what he could to steer the Decepticon.

Typhon wasn't having any of it. He shivered when the yellow twin hovered along his thrusters, the jet just managing to fly upwards enough to avoid a premature crash-landing. Rocks leered out of the ground in odd shapes, much like arms reaching up for the three of them. Doing what he could to swerve them off Typhon spun a couple of times. Their replies were cursing and a slightly tighter grip. Getting them off was going take a lot more than that. An idea struck him.

"I have played for long enough. Now it is your time to go." He told them with sardonic glee, almost slowing enough to float in the sky.

Both Autobots took full advantage of the easier target, steering him towards a patch of smooth ground. Typhon gathered his will and concentration before reaching out with a psychic hold on one of the Lamborghinis.

"...Now that felt weird." Sideswipe uttered. A moment later something yanked him from the jet with such force he dented Typhon's armour in a desperate attempt to stay on. Luckily he was only a dozen feet from the top of a cliff, and fell with a loud thud. He didn't feel much after that.

It took a few moments for Sunstreaker to realise what just happened.

"You're gonna pay for that!" He growled, starting to punch at the Decepticon above him. But something kept his fists from penetrating the jet's armour. A force field of some kind. He gripped the jet tighter as he prepared to kick Typhon's underside.

The Decepticon was far ahead of him. He launched far into the sky as fast as he was capable to the point of appearing as a dark blur. Rapidly he ascended, before he reached his limit on height. Which was sixty-five thousand feet. It was cold, dark and limited in air. Sunstreaker wasn't so sure of himself now, unable to do much but hang on.

"Oh do not _worry_." Typhon assured him, though in the tone he said it made the Autobot do the exact opposite. "You will not feel a _thing._" Then he dove. Full speed. The G-forces slammed into the yellow mech, making it harder and harder to stay online. Being a land-based fighter he naturally didn't have any resistance to such forces. Typhon on the other hand _was_. The forces were only an annoyance to him, though much of it slid past his stream-lined alt mode. He darted closer and closer to the ground, not appearing to slow down or stop, terrifying the Autobot until his systems couldn't take it anymore and was forced to go into stasis-lock. Typhon laughed, slowed dramatically until he was around one hundred feet off the ground, and threw the Autobot off him.

"My; that certainly was fun." He admitted as he left his foes to recharge with relatively minor damage. "Now they will think twice before trying to disrespect a flyer." He flew around the ocean, tracing a signal he had just picked up before he was attacked. "Though I might have to thank them later. Without their interference I might have ignored this signal..." It didn't take him long to discover the source of it. "Energon deposit." He mused to himself. "I am sure my superiors are going to take delight in this news." Deposits were far and few between. Now a large one presented itself away from Autobot territory. While his systems sparked from the light damage he had received from the Autobots he barely noticed it. He didn't think it was necessary to inform a Medic. He opened his com-link to the Communication Tower at the Decepticon Headquarters; and relayed the co-ordinates to the deposit. It was a pleasant victory.


End file.
